Mindful eating - revisited

I have struggled for a long time with my eating habits.

I have gone from whining in my head (and sometimes outloud) about 'how come other people can eat whatever they want?' to blaming western society in general for unrealistic body expectations, to saying, 'what the heck' and eating whatever I want, whenever I want, and then getting angry and belittling myself for not having the will power to eat less and exercise more. I've also found it maddening that I've been able to cut back consumption in other areas of my life, but not in the food area. I've blogged about that frustration before.

I've tried to be more 'mindful' while eating, and to not do anything other than eat when I'm eating. That worked for about five minutes and then I go back to doing what I've always done, which is chowing down while watching TV or reading. In short, nothing has worked (notice the disconnection here - it leaves me out of the equation entirely)...until now. Well, until about nine weeks ago. That's when (through the magic of facebook,) I noticed my sister doing an awesome job of losing weight, with the help of a website called myfitnesspal.com .

Don't worry, I'm not going to use my nice, non-commercial blog to talk up some product or service. In fact there is no product or service to talk up, really - it turns out it's all about that whole connection/disconnection thing again. By that I mean that I was completely disconnected from the facts about how many calories I was burning compared to how many I was taking in. And I was delusional in a sense, because I seemed to have the idea that just because I felt guilty about what I ate, and really wanted to exercise but was too [insert excuse here] to get up and move, that the laws of biology and physics would change for me and I would lose weight merely because I wished I could so badly. It was the calorie counting tools at MFP that stripped me of those delusions and reconnected me with the truth of "doing the math." There was no way I could balance my input of calories with my output of energy until I knew how much of each I was consuming/expending. And so now, nine weeks later, the number on the scale is heading nicely downwards. :) It's another example of joyful moderation that I am glad to incorporate into my life.

So, at last, I am at eating and moving mindfully. Not in the sense that I am doing only that and nothing else at the time, but with an over-arching yet basic awareness of the connection between what I eat and what I do. And I really think that it is this kind of fundamental awareness between consumption and its consequences that we as a species have to get connected with, and soon. I'm glad that I can do this myself in an everyday way now, and witness the results!

P.S. - If anyone is using MFP, my username is themyriadthings, and I'd be happy to be your MFP friend :)

Is it just me?

Is it just me, or are other people finding themselves transfixed by the falling price of oil and the stock markets? I check on the current price/level of these things many times a day. And kind of.....smile. Is that strange?

I feel bad about smiling...sort of. But I've been hoping for something to shake and wake people up to the fact that the world is changing, and a stock market crash seems like a perfect way to get this done, in the Western world. It hits us right where we feel it most - in the bank account. Ice storms, fires, tornadoes and other natural disasters are other types of 'wake up' events, but they generally involve terrible physical harm and suffering for people and animals. And in the long run they are just seen as anomalies anyway, not as wake up calls to the reality of global climate change and to the damage we are inflicting on the earth. Sadly, the rich and powerful nations only consider something a true emergency if it damages the uber-precious 'economy.'

I realize however that you have to be careful what you wish for. Sure, I'm glad now that the price of oil is tanking, and that the bitumen upgrader scheduled to be build on prime farmland just a few miles from me is now on hold indefinitely. And I'm glad also that people may be waking up to the fact that true wealth is not found in a stock portfolio or a savings account. But I haven't lost my job, and no one I know has lost their job, at least not yet. This can, and probably will change. So in the meantime, I will keep learning how to grow and store my own food, pay down my debt, build up the wood pile, and get better at making do with less. And try and encourage others to do these things too, even if they think I'm kind of weird for harping on and on about it. Although, with each drop in the stock market those things are looking less and less weird.

As I type this, crude oil is down to $49.94 USD. The TSX is at 8087 and the Dow is at 7904.

Ecological "Credit Crunch" gets a mention at last

This afternoon I came across this article on the CBC website. I was a bit startled to see it at first - I've become so used to environmental things being ignored that it surprises me when anything related to environmental sustainability actually gets published in the mainstream media.

The article talks about things that readers of this blog are likely quite familiar with: that we are increasingly outstripping the carrying capacity of our planet, and that we in the the 'western' world are the worst debtors of all in this regard.

A quick internet search revealed that September 23rd was this year's Ecological Debt Day - the day that the people of the earth had already used up the planet's capacity to generate resources and absorb waste for that year. In 2008 we will consume and excrete 140% of what the earth can give and take. According to the Global Footprint Network, humans first exceeded the earth's biocapacity in 1986, and each year we exceed it earlier and earlier.

This 'financial crisis' we're going through in the world now really pales in comparison. When we're cannibalizing our planet and poisoning it at the same time, it seems pointless to get too worried about some numbers on a scale that go up and down each each day, representing some kind of abstract derivative financial 'product'. How is it that the surreal and abstract became so important and the real and concrete faded into invisibility? Paradoxes like these always stretch my brain.

The Tao Te Ching is full of paradoxes too - maybe that's why I like is so much. I came across a modern interpretation of this text a short while ago. Here are a couple quotes to ponder from that version - I've bolded some of the lines that seem to get to the crux of the matter for me:

Chapter 19:

Get rid of sanctity.
People will understand the truth
and be happier.

Get rid of morality.
People will respect each other
and do what's right.

Get rid of value and profit.
People will not steal
if they do not desire.

If that's not possible, go to Plan B:
Be simple. Be real.
Do your work as best you can. Don't think about what you get for it. Stay focused. Get rid of all your crap.

And from Chapter 24:

Keep your feet firmly planted
unless you want to fall on your face.
Learn how to pace yourself
if you want to get anywhere.
Don't call attention to yourself
if you want people to notice your work.

Nobody respects people
who always have excuses.
Nobody gives credit to people who always take it.
People who hype themselves
have nothing else to offer.

Think of being in touch with Tao
like eating at a buffet:
Take only what you need.
Save some for everybody else.

It's way past time we stopped gorging ourselves at a buffet that was meant for everyone, for all generations, and rediscovered joyful moderation. And, of course, it's time I took my own advice and stepped up what I can do to only use my fair share.

Canadian Film: "Be The Change"

I wanted to help spread the word about this film by David Chernushenko, Canadian filmmaker and environmentalist (among other things). Its full title is: Be The Change - Living Lightly and Loving It.

It's not a doom and gloom film, but rather one that is a "celebration of the human spirit" and shows how living sustainably is a rewarding way to be and to act. According to the website, the film was even made locally to the film maker's Ottawa home base, and bus and bike directions are given to the film's premiere in Ottawa, this coming Friday, June 2oth. The trailer for the film is encouraging, not despairing, and fits well with what a bunch of bloggers have been talking about lately -- that people want to be part of something joyous and uplifting, not a movement that only talks about sacrifice, hardship and guilt.

Have you had a joyful moment related to sustainability recently? One that comes to mind for me was when I used my mesh produce bags at the grocery store and the teen-aged bag-person said, "Hey, that's cool." Tasting my home-grown kale in my noodle stir-fry yesterday was also pretty darn good!

A tribute to Crunchy Chicken

There is a movement afoot to recognize and honor quintessential green blogger, Crunchy Chicken. Crunchy is a blogger like no other. She and her blog epitomize the concept of integrity: she doesn't just talk about doing things differently, she does them! And she gets other people to do them too, through her witty, clever, forthright and sometimes jaw-droppingly funny blog postings and challenges. She leads by example, and perseveres towards her goal of living more sustainably, even when her family is faced with heavy duty challenges in life, in the form of her husband's blood cancer. I was glad to see that she was able to give herself a break from blogging when she needed it, and equally glad that she's back to posting again.

Crunchy got me started down the road of putting my newly-emerging ideals into action with her first Diva Cup Challenge. I was the lucky winner of that first Diva Cup, back when fewer than a hundred people would sign up for her giveaways. Before last year, I had never seriously considered using anything other than the usual disposable menstrual products, but these days I bypass that aisle in the grocery store almost completely. I've saved at least $100 in "feminine hygiene products" over the past year because of Crunchy's generosity and the Diva Cup (and later, Luna Pads). And what better way to re-direct these savings than to Crunchy's Goods 4 Girls Foundation! Seeing those videos of the girls in Kenya receiving those pads, knowing they could now go to school every week of the month without feeling anxious or embarrassed - it was a profound realization of global interconnection and sisterhood, and I know I wasn't alone in that.

Thanks Crunchy, for all you do, and for all the inspiration you continue to provide to all of us working towards living a life of joyful moderation, in interconnection with our local and global communities. Namaste.

A letter to my elected representative: feedback requested

In response to Thich Nhat Hanh's encouragement to write 'love letters' to our politicians, to GWAG's advice to write to our elected representatives regularly as part of our civic duties, and in response to Greenpa's clarion call to take action with regard to the horrible practice of food profiteering, I've written a letter.

This is the first draft of the letter, and I would really like some feedback on it, if people have time. It is quite long, but I wanted to provide suggestions instead of just criticisms, and I also wanted to make sure that my passion and convictions were evident on a number of topics. The letter is addressed to my recently elected member of the Alberta Legislative Assembly, Jeff Johnson. It turns out that this guy has experience as a 'pit boss' in the futures trading industry. So he could either be the best person to send this letter to, or the worst one. But I'm sending him something one way or the other. And then I'll send copies to the Alberta Premier too, and to the Minister of the Environment again. And then I'll modify it to send to the Prime Minister and the Federal Environment minister, even though they blew me off last time.

So if you have time, please do check out the letter and leave a comment with any recommendations or suggestions.

Thanks!

Documentary on Alberta Tar Sands tonight

Just a quick post to let any Albertans out there know about the CBC's documentary special airing tonight, called "Tar Sands: The Selling of Alberta." It airs tonight, March 13th, on CBC at 9 p.m. MDT and again on Sunday, at 8 p.m. EDT (which is 6 p.m. MDT, right?). Here is part of the summary of the program:

This hour-length documentary, commissioned by the CBC, tracks the growth of the world's largest reserve of 'unconventional' oil. This Florida-sized "environmental sacrifice zone" has become Canada's contribution to U.S. energy security in the post-9/11 world. Yet, for many, the tar sands are a global warming disaster.

Gord and I are sitting down to watch this tonight, probably with a bowl of popcorn and some of Chile's cocoa. The tar sands are a strange topic for me. Growing up in Alberta, I've heard about the the "oil patch" all my life. Until relatively recently, it was always a far away, distant thing for me. Just some grubby guys squeezing oil out of some tarry sand way up in the north somewhere.

But the tar sands now encroach on every aspect of life, from the pervasive environmental degradation, to the ridiculous amounts of traffic everywhere, to the ongoing glorification of the relentless pursuit of oil/money/power at all costs. I hate it and all it stands for now, yet I'm sure the economic benefits from it during the '70's were part of why my parents could make a good life in Alberta and give me and my siblings a carefree childhood. I guess it's an example of why moderation is good and excess is not.

I hope we Albertans can wake up and smell the excess, and soon.

Picture courtesy the Boreal Songbird Initiative, who know that a boreal forest should look boreal, not surreal.

Consumption

I've been thinking about this for a while. Lately my lifestyle has begun to incorporate less consumption of things: less electricity, fewer unncessary purchases, trying to generate less carbon emissions, less (virtually no) meat.

But I've not been able to consume less overall food. I eat way too many carrots, way too much popcorn, and way too much iced tea powder. Not to mention large portions of my meals and assorted bits of chocolate and the odd bowl of ice cream if Gord offers it to me. I'm trying to be this small footprint, anti-consumerism type person, and my whole mantra of moderation just leaves me altogether when it comes to my snacking/eating habits.

It seems like because I'm eating more vegetables now, I think I can just stuff myself with veggies and that my carrot/popcorn/iced tea powder snacks are my "entitlement" because of this.

I read about moderation in the Tao Te Ching and it all sounds good and feels right, and then it's like another brain takes over and I go to the fridge and get something to eat and scarf it down. I need to be more mindful about my eating. Instead I seem to go into a trance or something just before I make a decision about what to eat and then I'm oblivious to everything else when I'm chewing. I don't like that.

I lost about 22 lbs after I was sick with gastroenteritis about two years ago, and I really wanted to keep that weight off. I managed to keep it off for a year or so. I was exercising on the stationery bike fairly regularly then. But then I started eating more and more when my appetite came back fully after about three or four months, and it seemed like I wasn't putting on any weight. I ate more; I excercised less. Now I weigh ten more pounds than I did before I was sick. I am so tired of worrying about how much I weigh. It is a burden to me to think about it all the time. But I know that things don't change unless you change how you do things, so it is up to me to act differently. Sometimes I wish I'd just get sick again, for a couple weeks. This is irrational, but I wish for it anyway.